I also have a rke2-server service, I am unsure whether I should try to bring that up too

You do rke2-server XOR rke2-agent service, not both. So if you're already running rke2-agent then don't start rke2-server. It's weird to have an even number of etcd nodes. I'm not sure that works.

Right! there should be odd number of nodes for etcd... https://docs.rke2.io/install/ha

probably it never worked but the rancher web interface did not show any error...